TERFs & Tradwives: Intersections on TikTok

Normally, one would think that TERFs (trans-exclusionary radical feminists) and tradwives would be completely different, but that is not the case! TERFs and tradwives are actually quite similar in their beliefs.  

Tradwives, the same as TERFs, believe in gender binary. This means that both groups believe that there are only two “genders” (or sexes as they refer to them) and that your biology determines which gender/sex you are. 

Additionally, both TERFs and tradwives believe in femaleness, not feminism. Femaleness can be seen as, “smiling white women in dresses, aprons, and high heels with their makeup done and hair coiffed extolling the virtues of marriage, homemaking, and family values,” (Mattheis, 2023). Both groups see that women are women because of these virtues, NOT their femininity.  

The flag pictured above is the unofficial TERF flag, whose colours are similar to that of the Gender Queer flag.

Trad-culture and TERF ideologies share more than femaleness. “#Trad and Manosphere cultures share narratives of anti-feminism, a focus on ‘traditional’, binary gender roles, and promote a nostalgic view of a mythic past when people could be ‘real’ men and women without punishment,” (Mattheis, 2023). TERFs do not exactly believe in ‘anti-feminism’, but they do not believe in non-radical feminism, or non-gender critical ideologies. TERFs and tradwives are the most similar in believing that men are men and women are women, not that people can transition to the opposite gender.

Below, I have provided two TikToks. One is a TERF TikTok and the other is a Tradwife TikTok. Both share their beliefs, and it is clear how similar the two groups are.

“#Trad culture online showcases how gender, specifically notions of traditional (white) femininity, is used to reproduce whiteness while seeming ‘not racist’,” (Mattheis, 2023).

Both TERFs and Tradwives are rooted in power and oppression. TERFs have power over the marginalized group of transgender people, while Tradwives came to be from white women having the opportunities to be stay-at-home moms and wives. People of other races did not have this privilege.

With the power and privilege that tradwives and TERFs have, it is important that we be killjoys. Ahmed (2024) describes the three killjoys: killjoy truth, killjoy equation, and killjoy commitment. Online, the killjoy truth is needed. TERFs, tradwives, and those who oppose them are engaged in many different conversations. Killjoys, by noticing, engage in tough conversations about, and with, TERFs and tradwives. “To become a feminist killjoy is to refuse to concede by letting a problem recede,” (Ahmed, 2024). We can be killjoys by having these tough conversations head on—not letting hate drown out our capacities for love and community. We, as viewers, need to sit around the table and appreciate the diversity of perspectives, while also fighting for the safety of everyone at the table.  

Sources:

Ahmed, Sara. (2024). “Setting The Table, Some Reflections on Why Tables Matter,” feministkilljoys.com. https://usaskca1-my.sharepoint.com/:w:/r/personal/che275_usask_ca/_layouts/15/Doc.aspx?sourcedoc=%7BA7E35B5C-2D6B-458D-94E7-AA95117032B3%7D&file=Document%2014.docx&action=editNew&mobileredirect=true&wdOrigin=APPHOME-WEB.DIRECT%2CAPPHOME-WEB.BANNER.NEWBLANK&wdPreviousSession=5613c4bd-d446-41ea-96af-397a05cbfe3a&wdPreviousSessionSrc=AppHomeWeb&ct=1764542888526 

"Carpet Muncher” (@yourmommasgff). (2025). TikTok. https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSfpYqtSM/. 

Delano, Diffla. (@diffla.delano). (2025). TikTok. https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSfpYGroQ/. 

Mattheis, Ashley. (2023). “#Trad Culture: Reproducing Whiteness and Neo-Fascism through Gendered Discourse Online”. Routledge Handbook of Critical Studies in Whiteness (pp. 91-101). Routledge.